Sakuya Niwashiro (marakai_r) wrote in 4theloveofkami,
Sakuya Niwashiro

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"Je Vous Proteregai Toujours", chapter 2/?

Well, I live, and since I've been begged to continue this fanfic, I decided to. Let it note again that I know nothing of the Japanese entertainment industry, and I'm doing this the best I can. Also, in the making of this story, I have realized how much pointless information I know about these people. How sad I am.

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Title: "Je Vous Proteregai Toujours."

Raitng: PG-13/T for sexual comment, language, and situations

Pairings: Gackt/Kami/Gackt and one-sided Mana/Gackt

Chapter Number: Two of ?

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Chapter Two: Curtain Call

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Even though Kami had to take another shower when he got home from Gackt’s, due to the rain, and he stayed up worrying until around three o’clock in the morning, the twenty-four year old man woke up, as always, at 8:45, despite being more lethargic than normal. After taking another shower to wake up, and being relieved that practice didn’t start until close to noon, Kami got dressed and began, as usual, to clean his house.

As he vacuumed his living room, Kami began to think, as he usually did when he was alone. His thoughts wandered temporarily to the note, but feeling confidence that it was nothing (partially inspired by Gackt), he brushed it off as nothing more than a fan more obsessed than normal. Nothing really to panic about. Satisfied and calm, he then grew troubled as he thought of the main source of his problems.

His parents and said vocalist of Malice Mizer.

When he went to visit them over the weekend, they had, of course, brought up the topic of marriage. However, the approach they took to it was odd. He had sat through, before, the usual twenty-minute lecture of “Oh Kami you’re such a nice and smart boy, why don’t you have a girlfriend, you’re pushing twenty-five and you’re still a bachelor! Your father and I are starting to get concerned, I DO want a daughter-in-law and grandchildren, you know, and you ARE our only child. Just because you’re in a band doesn’t mean that you can’t have a wife! Maybe if you cut your hair, just trimmed it…!” before. He would sit there, smiling and nodding patiently (it was a survival tactic in Malice Mizer that he had perfected), while going over all of the reasons in his mind why he shouldn’t get married yet. He was too much in the public eye, his girlfriend wouldn’t have a moment’s peace because of it, he was always working and on tour and didn’t have the time to find a relationship, sex would just create scandal, etcetera. However, the argument they had when he went over this weekend was very different indeed.

“ Kamimura, are you gay? Don’t look at us like that, we’ve just been thinking and we’re fine with it, you know, if you are, we’d still love you…What?! Well, you haven’t had a steady girlfriend since your band got popular, and you always talk about that singer…Gackt, is his name? I mean, your father and I just noticed that you talk about him like he’s your lover! Now, I know you two are good friends, I’ve seen that whenever you’re on TV, I mean, it always seems to be “Gackt and Kami”. But you talk about him most of the time when we bring up the band or your friends! And you always smile and sound happy when you talk about him, too. And remember two months ago, when you got in a big fight with him? Every time you brought him up, you either started ranting or crying, and you sounded like you became a millionaire, if you aren’t already, when you made up…Dear, that’s just IT! You’ve NEVER talked about any of your old girlfriends like you talk about Gackt, haven’t you noticed…?”

Kami paused in his vacuuming and sighed, lowering his head and closing his eyes, feeling a headache coming on. Driving back home, he had ranted and raved at his parents, then started ranting and raving at “Damn Mana for hiring that damn Gackt to sing in the damn band, I was fine with Kozi singing, hell, even Tetsu’s caterwalling was fine! But noooo, we had to get a different singer that had to be free of an instrument, and then that Goddamned Gackt comes along and makes my parents get the wrong idea and annoy me about it…” He was fully convinced that, when he got home, he would stop hanging out with Gackt so much and would go and find a girlfriend the very next day, but then…

The only one he thought he could run to last night, when he was scared, was Gackt.

Kami sighed and finished cleaning, then sat on his couch and held his head in his hands, taking unusually deep breaths, now confused about everything.

What did he feel about Gackt?

After thinking about it long and hard, Kami compared him to past relationships, and realized that none of his friends or past girlfriends understood him as well as Gackt. Hell, if any of his past love interests had admitted that they had a name like “Camui”, Kami would have left on the spot in annoyance (what an obnoxious stage name, he really should talk to said “God of Music” about it). With Gackt, however, he found that he could tolerate his ego and his power trips, because there was so much more good to him than bad. Gackt made Kami happy, Gackt made Kami feel comfortable, and for the first time in his life, Kami had found someone that he missed whenever they were apart.

Was that just the sign of a good friend, though, or…?

Sighing, defeated, Kami decided that he might as well accept the fact that he could very well be in love with Gackt, and that maybe his parents had a right to be concerned, but then the drummer realized that there wasn’t much to worry about. For one thing, Gackt probably only thought of him as a friend. Also, he had always been attracted to girls before Gackt, and he had no problem having sex with them, he guessed. It wasn’t like that as soon as Gackt came along, girls had stopped being attractive to him, though now that he thought about it, Kami realized that he had trouble feeling excited about girls ever since he met Gackt…

Augh, that’s Gackt’s fault, not mine! Kami thought angrily, trying not to get frustrated. He’s messing up EVERYTHING.

No, there wasn’t a problem. If Kami turned out to be in love with Gackt, it would soon wear off, like a crush, and he’d be fine, find a girl, get married, make his parents happy…

I don’t WANT that, though! I don’t want to have some arranged marriage or marry some random girl, I want…I want…I want…!

The drummer suddenly stiffened as he heard a car pull up in front of his house.

Oh shit, that’s right! Gackt said he’d pick me up for rehearsal today! This is just GREAT!!

Quickly jumping up, Kami ran to the kitchen and splashed cold water on his face, trying to relax. Praying that Gackt wouldn’t notice anything wrong with him, he dried off his face, brushed back his hair, and drank a glass of water to try to calm down. Then, after he had successfully returned his breathing to a normal pace, he walked over to the door as soon as Gackt had knocked on it.

“ Hey.” Gackt smiled, and Kami found himself smiling back, strangely happy again. “ You ready to go? We have to be there in twenty minutes, or else Mana will throw a fit.”

“ Oh! Er…just a minute!” Dashing away, Kami quickly grabbed his sunglasses and bag, and returned to the doorway and put on his shoes. “ Sorry, I forgot about the time!”

“ It’s fine. Just try to hurry, okay? It’s a Monday, and I actually want a Monday to be a good day for once.” Gackt shrugged. Kami finished putting on his shoes and stood, grinning.

“ Ready, let’s go.”

Kami locked his door and they walked to Gackt’s spaceship of a car, the drummer being careful not to slam the door as he got in, knowing that drove Gackt up the wall. They had started carpooling together after the rehearsals and random stuff that celebrities had to do began to pick up to save up on stress. Also, the two lived nearby each other anyway, and it made them less recognizable to fans this way, thus being less likely to be ambushed by the masses of screaming girls.

“ So…” Gackt began after a minute of silence, weaving through traffic. “ What’s wrong?”

“ Huh?”

“ You’re a bit weird this morning.”

“ Oh…um…” Kami stuttered. “Just tired this morning, that’s all.”

“ Ah.” Gackt knew that the other man was lying, but decided not to push it. Kami didn’t liked to be pushed into talking about his problems. “ You eaten yet?”

“ No, forgot.”

“ Me either. Had to get running in a hurry. Did Mana tell you we’ve got a concert at the end of the week?”

“ No.” Kami’s stomach sank. “ Please tell me we don’t have only a week to memorize new steps.”

Gackt laughed at his friend’s dejected appearance. “ No, we’re doing all of the old hits from the last tour. It’s at the Tokyo Dome on Saturday.”

“ Thank God.” Kami sighed, relieved. “ I was starting to wonder if Mana was beginning to go insane.”

“ No…” This time it was Gackt who sounded depressed, or rather, annoyed. “ What’s his problem with me lately, though? He’s been ragging on me a lot more, lately, and he’s taken to watching me like a hawk. It’s getting really scary.”

The drummer could only gawk, wide-eyed, at Gackt as the other man took a sharp left. “ Are you blind or something?!”

“ What?” The singer sounded completely confused, so Kami decided to clarify.

“ Mana’s in love with you, Gackt, and he doesn’t know how to deal with it.”

Gackt looked at his friend, seeming completely thunderstruck, before breaking out into peals of laugher. “ Come on, Kami, you’re pulling my leg now.”

“ Red light,” Kami pointing out the traffic light that Gackt was about to go right through, and ended up regretting it when his head whipped forward after Gackt came to a harsh stop. The long-haired man rubbed his aching neck and continued. “ No, I’m not kidding. Mana’s got a crush, or whatever, on you.”

“ You’re serious?” Gackt started forward again.

“ Yes. The way he looks at you…” Kami sighed. “ It’s kind of sad. He looks at you kind of hopelessly, as he doesn’t know why he’s feeling what he feels for you or what to do about it. That’s all, it’s easily noticeable.” And I completely sympathize with him.

“ Really?” Gackt wondered. Kami nodded.

“ Yeah. Kozi and Yuki noticed as well.”

“ And you didn’t tell me?”

Kami shrugged. “ We didn’t want to compromise anything, I guess. Gackt, promise me that you won’t say a thing to Mana about it.” He broke off from his sentence to notice that, with some confusion, they were parked in the back of the Tokyo Dome. “ Is the concert today?”

“ No, we’re going to start dress rehearsals as soon as possible, since the concert was planned so close to our time-frame.”

“ Oh.”

“ Don’t worry, I won’t mention it to Mana.” Gackt said as the two got out of his car. “ Though I can’t believe I never saw it.”

“ That’s because you’re dense and completely absorbed with yourself.” Kami laughed jokingly, patting Gackt on the back. “ Come on, I’m starving. Let’s get something from a vending machine.”

“ I’m not hungry.”

“ You barely eat, and you’re awfully pale this morning. I mean, paler than usual.”

“ That’s because a certain someone woke me up at twelve in the morning and I couldn’t get back to sleep.”

“ Well, I’m sorry, but…”

As the two men’s voices faded from the bystander’s ears as they entered the building, the man managed click the shutter of the camera in his hands two times before they passed from his line of vision, eyes narrowed in jealously, rage, and anticipation.

Soon, very soon…

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“ So glad you two could join us this morning.” Mana commented dryly as Kami and Gackt ran into one of the business rooms behind the stage where the meeting was being conducted. “ You’re twenty minutes late.”

“ Sorry, Mana.” Kami spoke up, taking a seat between Kozi and Yuki at the large circular table, who were staring at them expectantly. “ I got home late last night and didn’t get much sleep, so Gackt had to wait a bit.” His eyes narrowed. “ By the way, thanks for notifying me about the concert, guys. It seems that everyone knew but me.”

Yuki shrugged. “ It’s not like we didn’t try to call you. But you never picked up your cell-phone.”

A light of realization passed over Kami’s face as he frowned. “ Oh, damn. I’m sorry, I left it at home, my bad.” Then, glancing at Mana, who was glaring at Gackt, who was glaring back, he spoke up quietly. “ Please tell me we don’t have to learn any new dances. And that there won’t be any parapara.”

Kozi snickered at the last part, and Mana’s eyebrows even quirked a bit, focusing his attention on Kami. “ Don’t worry, it’s jut the songs from the last album, not the one we’re putting out. Oh, and just for that comment, Kami, I’m going to make a personal note to myself to put together a parapara dance just for you.”

“ Thanks.” Kami gagged, sticking out his tongue at the leader of the band. Before anyone else could say a word, however, someone knocked at the door.

“ Enter.” Mana spoke up.

The door creaked open and a small stage-girl popped her head in. “ I’m sorry to bother you, but someone downstairs handed me a message to give to Kami-san.”

Puzzled, Kami stood up and walked over to the girl, taking a small, white envelope from her hands. Blushing, the girl bowed, then quickly slipped out of the room, closing the door slowly behind her.

“ What the…” Kami quickly ripped open the blank envelope, removing a small white folded piece of paper and two negatives that seemed to come from an instant camera. The young man quickly ran his eyes over the papers, then gave a small gasp, paling, eyes wide.

“ Kami, what’s the matter?” Gackt stood, alarmed. Shaking slightly, Kami handed the singer the two photos before opening up the folded piece of paper, quickly reading over it. Kozi and Yuki stood to take a look at the pictures, and even Mana, curious, stood and walked over, peering behind Gackt’s shoulder at the prints.

They were two pictures taken just a few minutes before, of Gackt and Kami entering the Tokyo Dome. The only alteration made to them was that Kami’s image was circled by red ink.

“ What the hell…” Yuki muttered, just as Kami spoke up, voice soft and startled.

“ Gackt…”

Instantly, Gackt was standing by long-haired man, reading over the letter, breath hitching in his chest. Kozi walked over, then Yuki, and finally Mana, and all of them were startled into silence by the contents of the letter, written in red, runny ink.


You’re looking well this morning
Happy and smiling
Making me long
Even more
To taste the sweetness of your skin
The concert is in five days
Then it ends
Enjoy your last moments of life
While you still can
My eyes are fixated
Only on you
You cannot escape me

I’m four miles away from you

Don’t look behind you

“ Kami.” Mana spoke up after a long moment of silence, voice sharp and serious. “ Tell me, is there anything you need to tell us now?”

Kami looked at Gackt, eyes filled to the brim with emotion, wondering what to do.

You cannot escape me

Gackt nodded back, realizing now that this was no longer a simple problem.

I’m four miles away from you

“ I got a fan letter last night.” Kami spoke up, shakily. “ In my mailbox. And I think it’s from the same person.”

Don’t look behind you

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To be continued…
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